I Shampoo Because I’m Greasy and I’m Greasy Because I Shampoo

Have you ever heard of the conditioner that hydrates, shines, smoothes, strengthens, protects and costs nothing? May be you haven’t but we all manufacture it. It is called sebum, A.K.A the grease that is secreted from the base of the hair follicles on your head.

My parents call me an extremist, my brother and a select few call me a hippie, however, I would like to think of myself as a purist. After all, we were not meant to wash our hair. So, I set out for the two week challenge, which turned out to be over 100 days without shampooing or conditioning my hair. I spent(past tense). I know this sounds totally gross. The thought of this may make you cringe, want to head to the loo to puke or stop reading this all together, however, you must also be wondering how I pulled off such an uncommon feat for so long while attending classes, giving hugs, and going about my daily business. Now you must also be wondering if you were one of the individuals who was hugged in this “unsanitary” sate. Oh, and I did this voluntarily. It was not prompted by a tight budget or lack of wheels, instead, it was do to my inquisitive nature mended with an organic lecture on protein structure. Let me explain.

Your hair is made out of a protein called keratin, and the genes in our DNA determine the way in which this protein folds, which translates into straight, curly and wavy hair. “My daughter” my professor explained “attributes her frizzy hair to me but I try to explain to her that it’s because she spends an hour in the shower twice a day.” Water is a polar molecule meaning it can break the hydrogen bonds, which gives your hair its shape, once these bonds are breached, your hair becomes dry and brittle. Sebum however, acts to waterproof your hair so that these bonds remain in tact.

The more you shampoo, the drier your hair becomes and thus the more oily your hair becomes to counter the dryness which creates a vicious positive feedback loop. For example: I shampoo cuz I’m greasy and I’m greasy cuz I shampoo. 

Also, consider this, the use of shampoo not only dries out your hair but also your face and body, so your body will respond by secreting more oil to counter this attack. The over expression of oil clogs your pores which requires you to use acne face wash which has side effects such as behavioral issues and the next thing you know you’re in therapy…all because you used shampoo. But I digress. Conditioner is applied to the shampooed hair to replace the natural oils that were stripped away with synthetic ones, to give your hair the shine, strength, and softness you desire. However why replace a good thing?

Now, for a bit of physiology. The secretion of sebum is made up of fatty acids, waxes, triglycerides, and squalene which act to soften, lubricate, hydrate and protect the hair in a bacterium killing sense. So if this secretion keeps our hair looking shinny, frizz free, hydrated, strong while combating foreign agents and it costs nothing…why are we washing our hair? It’s the conditioner that everyone wants but gets rid of. This is counterproductive and wasteful.

Did I mention sebum is odorless? Which brings me to my next point; could it be that our use of product is preventing us from finding “the right one” because it masks the body’s natural pheromones?

Of course when I explained this to my mom, my scientific endeavor was met with the usual, “don’t be an extremist” the same line I heard when I read a book about Buddhism, was a vegan for a year and stopped wearing mascara for eight months. Ironically, it seems as though the way we clean our bodies has become extreme.

Our bodies function to protect, nourish and detoxify. Our integumentary system, which is made up of the hair, skin, nails and their secretion, is our bodies 1^st line of defense and thus an impressive tissue that combats foreign invaders and prevents them from breaching the dermis. So let the system do it’s job, shall we? The next time you raise your bottle and prepare to squeeze some synthetic substance into the palm of your hand consider the benefits of your integumentary system. I’m not suggesting that you stow away the shampoo and conditioner for a hundred days but I am suggesting that you allow your hair and body to be cosmetic free for a few days here and there. This way our body will be able to serve and protect.

While I was conducting my scientific experiment, I noticed that I shed fewer hair follicles, there was less fizz, my hair dried extremely fast and it was always shinny. Now I wash my hair about every 3 days and I use Dr. Bronners which is a biodegradable shampoo that is safe for you and the environment.  I no longer blow dry or straighten. I have given up the battle I carried on with my hair for so many years, trying to force it to do the opposite of what it wants to all the while causing splits ends and frizzy dry hair. Once you learn a little chemistry you’ll understand that the bonds of your hair weren’t meant to be broken.

Long story short, hygiene is the least of my worries on the trail. In the book, “The Appalachian Trail: How to Prepare for and Hike it” by Jan D. Curran there is a quote that kicks off the chapter on Sanitation which says, “what separates two people most profoundly is a different sense and degree of cleanliness”- Nietzche. So do I need a ruler or a map to measure the distance between us?