Globs of Bloody Glub

Picture this. I'm at work and since most of my job requires me to stand behind the counter and check people in using a computer, I have internet access. So I spent some time on my blog making a list of all the trail items I have left to get.

My manager, Boulder, walks over and asks to see the list. I was a bit hesitant because I had, diva cup and homemade pad listed, and we all know that it is taboo to discuss anything that has to do with periods around men. Even though the grossed out fools would not be here if it wasn't for our monthly flow. But I was confident my scritch scratch and the foreign term "diva cup" would disguise its true meaning.

Out of the dozen items on my list his eyes fell right on the ones under hygiene, "what's a diva cup" he asked. Just tell him it's this new type of titanium mug or thermos that I'm looking to buy, I thought. "A homemade pad" he gave me the "explanation please" look. Maybe I should say that I'm thinking of making a homemade tent, you know since it's my home I call it a pad, I thought. The problem is that I haven't blogged about this yet so I was unprepared as to how to deliver an explanation.  

I learned my lesson 11 years ago. I was at the end of my driveway with my older brother waiting for the school bus to come and quite enthusiastically I belted out, "Guess what Steve...I got my period!!"

"That is so disgusting, don't ever say anything like that to me again!" was my brother's response.

I am a proponent of education, so after a moments pause, I decided to fill my manager in on all the bloody details. I explained that a diva cup was like a reusable tampon, instead of soaking up it collects the flow. A homemade pad is a reusable female napkin which can be fashioned from a flannel T.

Whether or not you are aware of it, females produces loads of waste in the form of bloody pads and tampons. Just think, the average woman gets her period 12 times a year for about 5 days and changes her pad and tampon roughly 3 times a day. Some women use both pads and tampons at the same time, so this equates to about 360 pieces of soiled absorbents every year/woman. Now each woman contributes on average 40 years worth of waste. That means that most woman that are using pads and tampons contribute about 14,400globs of bloody glub during their lifetime.

With the diva cup and homemade pad, the only waste that I will be producing each year is blood.

For more about the Diva Cup check out the posts: Walking Diva and Male Discretion Advised: More on the Diva Cup.